Throughout my life I have learned that there are many different types of people in this world. I have heard the saying "It takes all kinds..." more times than I can begin to recall. I truly think that as we grow into ourselves (the selves that God ultimately would have us become and realize we are), we outgrow friends. I believe that there are three types of friends: 1) friends that are brought into our lives for a short time and teach us something about ourselves, 2) Life long friends that totally "get" you and understand that you develop and change throughout life and they continue to appreciate you for who you are and what you can bring to one anothers' lives. This second set of friends are the ones you can sit in the same room with and not say a word but leave feeling fulfilled and 3) A friend that is unlike you in so many ways that it just seems like the friendship could never work to the outsider, yet when you talk to or hang out with that person somehow it just works.
In my lifetime I have had a lot of friends that fall into the first category. These are the friends you might work with for a couple years, you hang out with, and then when you (or the other person) leaves their job, you move on; most of the time, better (or more well-rounded) for knowing the person. I have also found that I have a lot of friends in this category that I never thought would be in this category while I was actually in the friendship; most of my high school friends fall into this category. People change.
(*WARNING: I am about to rant for just a second*)
There is nothing that drives me more crazy than when someone doesn't just appreciate the friendship for what it was and accept that sometimes people change...and just because they change doesn't mean that they think they are "better than you" or "above you" it just means that they are a different person. I think change is healthy. I am the same person that I was in high school and yet I am not. My personality is the same but my views on life are quite a bit different. ENJOY PEOPLE FOR WHO THEY ARE--NOT WHAT YOU WANT THEM TO BE.
(*Stepping off my soap box*)
I, also, have had (and still have) the privilege of having the second type of friend. Actually, I can say I have 3 VERY CLOSE friends...I guess some call them "best friends". Amazingly, my three best friends (I love you guys!) are all very different people -- different from each other and, in a lot of ways, different from myself. But these are definitely the women I know I can turn to for anything...at any time.
...and then there are the third type of friends. These are the types of friends that actually prompted the writing of this email. In my experience, the friendship is so unlikely and then you actually sit down and talk to this person and you find that on some level you really "click". I do think this third type of friend can (and will), more than likely, also fall into one of the aforementioned categories.
I was on the phone with my SIL the other day and for some reason it just dawned on me that we are so different and yet we really enjoy one another's company (or at least, I enjoy hers -- haha). It is a lot of fun hanging out with her. There are a lot of ways that we are different but the biggest difference is our view of religion and politics (the two big ones!). I am a Christian and she is atheist (I think). :) I am pretty conservative and she is pretty liberal. The more I think of our differences, the more I am amazed we can even be in the same room with one another. haha. And yet, she has come to visit me on more than one occasion (even flying all the way across the country to visit in NC once).
So, how does this third type of friendship happen? Who knows. I think they should just be appreciated for what they are. My SIL has completely different religious views than myself. Many Christians would say this is a bad thing. That I shouldn't intermingle with someone with different beliefs than myself. I have to disagree. Although she does not agree with me on this level, she has taught me to see other people's viewpoints and take them for what they are...Do we always have to agree with one another? Of course not. Do I wish she were a Christian? Of course I do. I would be lying if I said I didn't. Do I push my religious beliefs on her? No. If she decides to believe in Jesus as the sacrificial Savior and God as the omnipotent "being" that he is (I am sure she might think "what if God is a 'she'?" here - haha) then that is up to her...it is not my place to make her uncomfortable and it is not my place to judge. There is only one Judge and it most certainly isn't me.
I guess that is partially what it boils down to. The main thing we both have in common is the fact that we aren't judgemental.
You know, I just don't know. I think that somewhere deep down, you just have a "connection" with a person/people that is natural. I believe that God does this for a reason. Do I think he sent my SIL my way?...of course I do...and I will continue to thank him for this unexpected intercessor in my life. :)
(*sidenote) As I was looking for a picture for this blog it dawned on me that the third types of friendship are like the lion and the lamp. ;)
FYI: I started this email a week or two ago and am just now sitting down to finish it. This has taught me something -- ALWAYS finish your thoughts before stopping because my point has been diminished someone because my thought process has been thrown off track. Sheesh...I was on a roll...that is what I get for stopping 1/2 way through -- I forgot 1/2 the things I wanted to say.
No comments:
Post a Comment